Memorial Service for Maria Sue Chapman 11am

even as i type this, the chapman family is preparing to attend maria's memorial service.  my heart and prayers have been with them all morning.  please take a moment to say a prayer for them on this incredibly difficult day.  i wanted to share the following video...it is heart wrenchingly prophetic...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4B1XM9jWiLl

faith vs. fear

my heart has been heavy ever since i heard about the stephen curtis chapman family losing their five yr old daughter.  it is beyond my comprehension what it would mean to lose one of my children.  then, to make things worse, the fact that their son accidentally ran over her.  i can't imagine the guilt that poor boy is feeling.  what that family is dealing with right now is unbelievable.  we need to keep them covered in prayer...

rylee (my five yr old daughter) and i were driving home from the grocery store yesterday.  i was thinking about the chapman family as rylee started singing from the back seat "you are my sunshine, my only sunshine...you make me happy when skies are grey...".  i said a prayer and thanked God for my precious first born but also acknowledged that she, first and foremost, belongs to Him.  how scary it is to be a parent.  these precious little people are entrusted into our care and there are no guarantees.  fear is a paralyzing force when we allow it to control us. freedom from fear comes through faith in a God who is sovereign, just and loving.  Lord, help me choose faith and not fear!  

incubator and sperm donors

i ended up taking kade to the ER on Saturday.  his fever was continuing to spike and his cough getting worse and didn't want to wait until today to take him in.  turns out he has bronchitus (sp?).  the dr. gave him an antibiotic to prevent infection and cough medicine.  he's doing much better and is no longer running fever.  hopefully, this won't be passed around like the fever virus....so far so good.  

got news friday that grey's incubator (bio mom) signed away her rights.  wasn't worried but relieved to know that.  she also named a sperm donor (bio father) who is currently in jail.  he has to sign away rights or sign a waver stating that the child is not his.  also...she is legally still married to the twins' sperm donor and therefore he has to sign a waver stating that grey is not his. (sounding a little soap operaish?)

hopefully...both prospective sperm donors will sign whatever and we will get to officially adopt in october or november.  i would love to have it done before christmas.   we have to have him 6mths before the adoption can be final.  

i don't mean to seem harsh with using the words incubator and sperm donor... i actually looked up the definition of mother and father in the dictionary.  i was curious what it would say. interestingly enough...the definitions were "a female or male parent".  so...i looked up parent and found that a parent is "a person who brings up or cares for another.  i just don't feel they have the right to be called mother and father.  kyle and i are the male and female parents and we are the ones that are bringing our children up and caring for them.  therefore, we are bestowed the honor of being called their "mother and father".   ok....stepping down from the soap box :)

on a lighter note...i'm going to dinner with kristin and kristi tonight.  we're going in honor of our birthdays.  they are all close together...fun times...can't wait.  in fact, it's what is getting me through the day...i'm pmsing like crazy!!!  i know......tmi........but it is my blog!!! :)

blessings on this fine day!!!!!! 

  

facebook rocks!!!!!

ok......so i'm a huge facebook fan and here is why!  i have found old friends from zimbabwe that i have had no contact with for twenty years.  it's crazy.  another one of my best friends in 7th/8th grade found me today.  i was sooo excited.  it's just really neat to be able to know where these old friends are and what they are doing now.  some of them live in new zealand, australia, england and there are a few still in zimbabwe.  zim is in a lot of turmoil and has been for many years...it breaks my heart.  pray for zimbabwe...they need it desperately. 

facebook allows you to keep up with people from every stage of your life.  it's just really cool.  isn't technology grand???

kade and i are home this weekend.  kyle took the girls and grey to waco to see his family this weekend.    we were all supposed to go, but kade started running fever again. don't know what is going on with him.  might be taking a trip to the doctor this week.   

got a certified letter about grey's permanency placing staffing coming up.  basically everyone involved in his case can show up and throw in their two cents.  i'm hoping to get to go.  i think i need to be there.  i don't anticipate anything negative but i know that bio parents get certified letters too with there option of representation of their choice...which the state pays for...how much sense does this make i ask you?  ughhhhh.  the system...i could go on for days!  but i won't.  

ok...enough rambling.  i'm going to fix my sick baby boy some lunch.  it's been kind've nice to spend some time alone with him.  we don't get that very often, so i'm trying to take advantage of it.   

6 pds...woo hoo!!!!

ok....so i realize that this is all water weight...but still......it feels good.  i've made really healthy food choices the past two days and have started exercising again.  so...i have a kid story for you and it went a little something like this...

(upon me asking the kids to clean up the playroom, the following conversation ensued)

rylee:  why do we have such a mean mom?!

kade:  yeah....mom is mean!

rylee:  i think we should find another mom!

lily:  yes...one that won't make us clean up!

...they then broke out into song (not kidding).  they started singing "it's a hard knock life" from Annie as they proceeded to clean up the playroom.  (lily even threw in a few flips and rolls in her rendition)  i stood at the door CRACKING up.  my children are funny!!!  

baby grey turned 6mths old yesterday.  he has been such a joyful addition to our family.  i knew before we got him that the joy would far out way the difficulty and i was right!  he's been drooling like crazy...he's trying to get his first tooth.  other than that, he continues to do very well.  

i had teachers meetings with my kids preschool teachers over the past couple of weeks.  they are all doing very well and are all on target for where they should be.  i cried in kade and lily's meeting because i am soooo amazed at God's goodness.  for those of you who don't know, they were both very delayed in a lot of areas when we got them.  it's sooooo amazing to hear their teachers tell me how bright and enthusiastic they are to learn.  

rylee is starting kindergarten in the fall and her teachers feel confident that she is ready.  they told me to be prepared because she is the class clown and social butterfly.  (sound like anybody else we know :)  she is her daddy!!!!  i wouldn't have it any other way....she keeps us laughing just like he does!  

oh....danielle....i LOVE that you're reading my blog.  i'm honored that anyone does :)  also, i'll forward the pics to you soon.  you too, dimple queen :).....sorry i haven't done that yet!!!  

blessings everyone!!!

33 is 7 years from 40...

so today i turned 33.  every year in the thirties seem to get stranger and stranger.  a friend reminded me today that i was seven years away from forty.  how does life keep speeding up?  i feel like i'm on an out of control roller coaster..............stop..............i wanna get off!!!!  :) ok...back to reality.  

my weight has really been bothering me.  i'm a stress eater...many of you know this about me and many of you have seen me pack on 36 pounds over the last 2 1/2 years.  it all started when i got the twins...  i'm determined that i really need to get a handle on my weight before i completely lose control.  i've not had good eating habits and exercising has become non-existent.  so.....it's time.  i'm doing it.  i'm going to lose 48 pounds.  i've put a ticker to the right so you can track my progress.  you have my permission to "let me have it" if you don't see that ticker moving :)  

now i will recap mother's day and my birthday.  i stayed home from church yesterday morning because lily and grey were running fever.  (we've had some weird fever virus-started with kade)  anyway...around 2pm i started running fever and felt completely wiped out.  i pretty much laid around or slept the rest of mothers day.  woke up this morning still not feeling well....happy birthday to me :)  laid around again...kyle went to work for a little while and then came home to take care of the kids (have i mentioned that i have the most wonderful husband on the planet?)  there is nothing more miserable than taking care of kids when you feel like poop...  

he was planning on taking me out tonight but i asked if we could postpone my birthday outing when i was feeling better.  

all in all..............it was a couple of miserable days.  however, i must say that i can't help feeling incredibly blessed.  i have four beautiful, healthy and happy children and one amazing man who loves his family well.  what more could a wife and mother ask for???  

ok...i'm off to bed.  i have to wake up in the morning and play catch up after being off my feet for two days...............ughhhhhhhhhhhhh.....the laundry...it never ends :)

sick and tired :D

kade is sick and i am tired...  kade started running very high fever last night (104).  the other three seem fine so far.  i'm driving myself and them crazy trying to keep them away from each other (not possible).  he doesn't have any symptoms...just the fever.  weird.  he doesn't seem sick at all when his fever is down.  

i took grey to the doctor on monday.  it turns out that his "congestion/wheezing/breathing" is something that he will grow out of.  the doctor said that his lungs and ears are clear and that he has a "flap" or something that is making the noise when he breathes and that it should resolve itself.  so...that was good news.  also, he has been constipated and when he does have a b.m. it is very hard and sometimes painful.  she said to give him 3-4oz. straight prune juice.  well....it worked...he had 2 blowouts yesterday.  i was sooooo happy :) (i know you're happy too, Juju :)  

he weighs 17pds and is in the 58th percentile.  she said he is the picture of health.  yay!!!  

i registered my first baby for kindergarten yesterday.  it was very surreal walking into the school.  i was impressed with everything i saw.  the classes were very structured and i observed some teaching.  i know she is going to love going to school.  she is such a social butterfly and loves to learn.  i know i will be fine...it's just hard turning your baby over to the world.  

this weekend is mother's day/birthday weekend for me.  i'll be 33.  i haven't decided what to ask for yet.  i'm leaning toward a massage/mani/pedi.  we'll see.  every birthday seems weird now...  mentally, i still feel like i'm 24ish.  physically, i can tell i'm 33 :)  

getting excited about the summer.  a lot of fun stuff going on with the preschool ministry, rylee and i are going to high school camp and meredith johnson is coming to live with us!  she is going to intern with our preschool minister/take classes at San Jac and live with us for the summer...soooo excited!  

ok...that's all for now.  i need to get busy..have tons to do.